Copy Court 2 – Website Critiques

Here’s how this works: We selected a handful of submitted websites and manuscripts from attendees… and unleashed our Simple Writing System faculty writers on them.

The panel critiques the effectiveness of the copy, points out weak headlines and sales angles… and hits the essentials they normally cover in their super-expensive paid-consultations with clients.

This segment should give some idea what it’s like to get personal attention from top writers

On stage: Harlan Kilstein, David Deutsch, Lorrie Morgan-Gerrero, Stay Morganstern, Colin Joss, Colin Chung, David Reybold, Leah Carson

Moderator: Robert Gibson

Jen Spencer: www.LearnHowToMakeBows.com

Stacy: She should only have one or two fonts, colors, sizes and she has a variety of colors and fonts. It doesn’t look professional.

Also there should be an example of what bows you can make.

Colin: Testimonials should be more descriptive about the person giving the testimonial

Colin Joss: Need more benefits of the bows,

John: invite the reader to engage.

David: Optin box should be above the fold.

Chris Haddad (In the audience): Most important is the headline, don’t ask for the first name.

11:33: John talks about experiments conducted on video sales letters.

Harlan: Pure squeeze page is going out of fashion. You can’t use test results from IM and apply it directly to other markets.

Find other terms for Hair bows so it isn’t used as many times.

Kevin Rogers (in the audience) You should use more images.

Robert Gibson: Put Facebook widget on the opt in page, decorate testimonials (pictures, last names)

Closing pop-up is aggressive. Sometimes it comes back 2 – 3 times.

17:48: Dr. Carl Rowe:

David Deutsch: What are you offering? He shouldn’t have an image of box if he wants then to opt in for a free report.

Too much corporate stuff at the top.

Harlan: Will you marry me syndrome. Stick with one thing. Does he want the prospect to become a distributor or opt in for more info?

24:16: His picture is there. What does he bring to the table to make it worth having his image there.

He said he wants to try to brand himself.

John: That is Coca cola type branding and is not important at this time.

27:00 Erica Douglass reviews basic SEO. Engagement is more important than on page SEO.

Frequency of updating is more important than backlinking.

30:14: Michael Denby www.DenbyEnergy.com

30:41: Robert Gibson rewrites his home page for him.

Colin Joss: There is no real salesmanship there.

Colin Chung: Read the bix op ads in magazines, and use them as a guide

Harlan: He needs to get keywords with better traffic. He should re-do the site as a biz-op.

Colin Chung: He should use paid advertising rather than SEO. Try direct mail.

Jason Moffet: He should show before and after bills on the site.

38:07: Clint Arthur: www.thelastyearofyourlife.com

“The Last Year of your life” is depressing. There should be a more uplifting message. It looks like they are targeting people who are about to die.

Stacy: There is confusion about what the prospect should do. There are several offers on the page.

Robert: He needs testimonials. Too much description of the chapters. There should be an excerpt. You should be selling a vision, not a book.

John: It is not about a book. It is about what the book does for people.

Stacy: Should emphasize transformation rather than the process.

47:12 Everyone on the panel gave him a suggested headline

45:19 John Kubic: www.ppswc.com

This site targeted dentists. His experience is with calling them. He wants to get into a more hands-off model.

David Deutsch: He is asking people to call without giving them any benefit. That is a bit scary for the prospect. Better to be less threatening and ask for email.

Harlan: This market is hyper-responsive.

What is the goal…watch the video, fill out a form…call him.

He suggests he adapt Brian Johnson’s webinar model.

57:22 John gives a lot of tips about getting past the gatekeeper.

He has a lot of experience getting past the gatekeeper. He should adapt those skills to his online marketing. Why did they work? How might that translate to other media?

1:00:05 Robert: Have a separate site for each letter for testing. Loose the quotes all over the place, and speak English.

1:01:20 Stacy talks about how to frame his benefits. His average is $1,000/year, which really isn’t that attractive.

1. Pick 3 suggestions that you think will help your website.
2. Start with the highest priority and implement it.
3. Continue with the other 2.
4. Go back and watch the video again and see if there are other suggestions that would help.
5. If so, implement them in the order of highest impact on your results.

No rocket science here…just take action!

These are the sites that are still live:

Jen Spencer: LearnHowToMakeBows.com

John Kubic:  prioritypaymentsystems.com