Welcome back to the club!
What’s happening in the Clubhouse
Click here to join the conversation
Latest Activity
-
Edward Byrne posted an update 9 years, 1 month ago · updated 9 years, 1 month ago
I am reposting this with a link to the copy. Would really appreciate some opinion on this copy. It is a “negative reframe” of 2 alternatives to my product (a give up smoking eBook) My thanks.
cocoallegro Negative Reframe – cocoallegroNicotine Replacement Option negative reframe… -
JonathanC posted an update 9 years, 1 month ago
While looking up a Finnish customer\’s name (to see if it was actually a name) I stumbled upon this guy. I think he was in the DVD for SWS, no? The poker player. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Juha_Helppi
-
Edward Byrne posted an update 9 years, 1 month ago · updated 9 years, 1 month ago
Am I allowed to post copy here for opinions from members or the team?
-
Yes, you are, Edward.
-
-
The Marketing Rebel Team wrote a new post 9 years, 1 month ago
John Carlton Copywriting Tips: Learn How to Write to Women
In this clip, John Carlton tells the best way to get into the female mind and figure out how to write to women. John’s comments: By […] -
Larry E. posted an update 9 years, 2 months ago
Just to let everyone know John\’s first RANT of the new year is ready to read and it\’s a great one!
If you didn\’t read December 2015 go back and read it cause you\’re missing out on a lot of great stuff!
http://www.John-Carlton.com
All my best,
Larry E
Recent Member Lessons
How to Use Loom Video Creation Software
Loom is a Chrome Extension that allows you to create quick screen capture or webcam videos. It is similar to Screencast Capture (which replaced Jing and which I use on almost a daily basis) with a couple of notable exceptions: Loom allows you to create webcam videos,...
Intro to Snapchat
Snapchat is probably not on the radar for many of you (unless you happen to be within their demographic sweet spot of 18- 24 year olds), but it's still good to stay in touch with new technologies. Also, Snapchat has what they call Publisher Stories, which allow...
World Time Buddy gives you the time anywhere in the world
World Time Buddy is a website that lets you keep track of the time for locations throughout the world. It is very simple to use. I created a short video to show you what to do. One thing I neglected to do in the video was to show how to open an account, so you don't...
How to set up Google Alerts
If you need a constant influx of new, updated information to post to a blog, Facebook, LinkedIn, etc., here is an easy way to find it. Google has a program called Google Alerts. When you set up an alert, Google will scan the internet on a daily basis and pull in blog...
Premium Programs
Platinum Mastermind
The Simple Writing System
Enter The Clubhouse
Kick-Ass Copywriting
Carlton Swipe Files
The Freelance Course
Edward,
It’s hard to give feedback on 2 snippets of copy without knowing how they fit into the whole.
The first thing I’d check is if you are consistent in your warnings. Do smokers “… pretty much run our lives around smoking …” or “… run our lives…”.
I think you’ve made a case against each of these two options.
PS – I deleted you…Read more
Good point, thanks Stan.
‘pretty much’ is redundant
As I just put out a Sherman Platinum. (Oops, another deep tissue addiction) I found your copy intriguing as a whole. The “reward” and “deserved time out” resonates with smokers. (You’ve crawled into their heads!) I only smoke one a day, but I guess that’s how all addictions start.
Mark L – SWS Senior Instructor since 2008